Listening

Dear Carter,
One of the things that your life and death have taught me is that I really need to take time to appreciate the little things. When you were alive, I appreciated every moment that I got to hold you.... every new thing that you did...and every day that we got to spend together. There were several times when I would hold you in the middle of the night, and try my hardest to imprint how you felt and what you smelled like in my mind. I would thank God that you were my son, and pray that you would be here with me forever. I can remember several times when I would literally cry at the thought of you leaving.... because I always knew that it would probably happen at some point in my life, but never EVER thought it would be after only 14 months.
Now that you have grown your wings, I take comfort in appreciating the little things that remind me of you. As you know, I am always on the lookout for butterflies and pennies, but there are other little reminders too. Soon after your passing, a dear friend of mine told me that she was listening to the thunder and thinking about you, my sweet boy, playing the drums up in Heaven. She told me that there was definitely a party up there because she could hear it.
Tonight we are having a Summer rainstorm, and I can hear you playing away. Mikey asked me if the rain drops were your tears. I told him that if they were your tears, they were happy ones. So, play away my little one, play away! We're listening!

The Final Piece

Dear Carter,

Today we put in the final piece. It feels good to have your headstone now, but at the same time it feels sad to know that we have to have one at all.

I think it turned out perfectly. The handprint and footprint are your actual prints from the day that you grew your wings. Can you believe that they can engrave those like that?! The lady from the monument place called to be sure that they were the right size because she thought that the foot looked a little long. I laughed, thought of your monkey toes, and assured her that they were indeed the right size.

We got the saying on the base from a necklace that my friend, Becky, sent to me after you passed. I am confident that this is the way you were taken to Heaven, so it seemed very fitting.

I finally had that dream I've been waiting for. The other morning I was dreaming that I picked you up, kissed your cheek, and just as I was about to inhale your sweet smell..... I woke up. I tried hard to fall back to sleep, but of course the sleep would not come. It still gave me comfort to know that I may dream of you. The rest of the day was long and hard since I missed that feeling so much. I just miss you.

Thank you for sending us so many butterflies lately. It helps me so much on those days when I wonder if you are OK. We even saw a balloon heading to Heaven the other day. Mikey and Jovie thought for sure that you would have fun playing with it.

I love you. My sweet boy.

A Call For Help

Team Carter needs your help!

My amazing friend, April a.k.a. Pinkebody, is going to be doing a fundraiser in honor of Carter Jay.

Here is her blog post about the fundraiser: Pinkebody

Basically, in September, she will be holding a fundraiser on her Hyenacart shop to raise money for Operation Smile. All money will be donated in honor of Carter. She is currently looking for donations, so if you are interested in donating a handmade item, yarn, or a knitting slot, please contact her here. Remember that it only takes $240 for one operation which will change the recipients life forever.

April is VERY talented. Anyone remember this outfit?

Yup, that is her handiwork! I never thought that clothes could make that sweet boy any cuter, but what do you know, they sure did!

I'll be posting more details as I find them out. Thank you to April, and anyone else who helps with this project...it means a lot to know that Carter can still put his stamp on the world.

Roy Days 5K and 2 Mile Walk ~ August 7th

Team Carter will be participating in the Roy Days 5K and 2 Mile Walk on August 7th.

If you are interested in joining us, you can pre-register here for a fee of $15.
http://www.runnercard.com/e/runner.Main?meet=2808

Clinton City Parade

Dear Carter,
After the 5K run on Saturday, we met up with your Aunt April at the parade. Look at this! We finally got a decent picture of the two of us together....that is unheard of! Notice the butterfly shirt she is wearing just for you! I really wish that you could have been there. Jovie got to ride on one of the floats...she asked me if you'd be able to see her, and I assured her that you were most certainly watching.She threw candy out to Mikey as fast as she could. It was so cute! Afterward, we came home for a quick shower, and went back to the carnival to watch Jovie perform her dance routine. She did an excellent job. We're all so proud of her!

While we were walking through the carnival, we ran into one of mommy's old friends, Jena. She was visiting from Virginia. It was so exciting to see her, and it just made the day even better. Mikey and Jovie played on the waterslide with their cousins until it was time for fireworks. It was a truly almost perfect day.