July 3, 2012

Dreaming Of You

Dear Carter,

I've been wishing for this for over two years, and it finally happened.

Last night I had a very VERY vivid dream of you.

For some reason you had come back to us from Heaven, and I was holding you and telling whoever was listening that I was never EVER letting go of you again.  You looked at me and smiled, and I kissed that little spot on your cheek that I loved so much.  I've had dreams before where family members are telling me that you had come back, but I've never actually seen you before. Just a lot of runnning around trying to find you.


I woke up a few moments later.

I will cling to the memory of this dream for as long as I can.  I could actually feel the softness of your cheek, and smell your sweet scent.  Just thinking about it brings back that sense of calmness, but at the same time it feels as though my heart is ripping open.  Every time I feel like that pain is creeping in, I remind myself that in only 50-60 years I will be holding you again, and I won't have to let you go.

Thank you God for blessing me with this sweet reminder of the things I miss most about my boy. 

1 comment:

Lauralee said...

The last time we had Zachary for visitation we were playing outside, and a big beautiful butterfly kept swirling his head. He giggled and he was so happy. I couldnt help but think it was Carter coming to play. I think our boys would be friends.