March 17, 2011


Dear Carter,
I still miss you every moment of every single day, but lately I have really felt at peace with you being gone...that's not to say it won't change at any time. But right now, I feel OK with it. I know that it is all because I have so much faith that you are with our God, and that we will be with you again. Those moments we will have with you will be much, much, much longer than these moments that I have without you.

Now, saying that I'm at peace with it does not mean that it hurts any less. I want you to be here with me....I want to hold love on just see your adorable little face.

I just simply miss you.

I miss all of the moments that we did have together. The missing you makes me want to enjoy the other little moments that I get to have with your Daddy, brother and sister, and I appreciate them so much more.

Moments like today when I picked up Jovie from her tumbling class, and she couldn't wait to tell me that she had finally passed off a tumbling trick that she has been working on for weeks. I couldn't have been more proud of her, and when I told her so she said to me "You know Momma, I'm really proud of myself". What a precious little girl!

Moments like this when I forced the kids to do a quick St. Patrick's Day photo shoot, and they obliged for me without complaint (of course I did coerce them with brownies). I love how they love each other and you so much! Moments like this when your brother and sister were amazed at how a leprechaun could really turn our local fountain green. They were so excited to see it!

Moments like tonight when we all sat in our backyard and just enjoyed the company of each other. I appreciate all of these moments, and pray that there are many more. I only wish that we could have had all of these moments with you.
And I really know that in some way we did.


Chrissy said...

Love. all of it.

Colleen said...

Your kids are so precious! I'm happy to hear that you are finding peace, even though I'm sure you still have very hard days.