Here we go! I'm starting with the letter "A" again because I have no idea where I left off before.
I've recently gotten myself involved with the PTA at your brother and sister's school. I have to say that the very best part of it has been meeting new people. I can honestly say that I've made some new friends from it, and I love it! I never EVER thought of myself as a PTA person, but here I am...the Health and Safety Commissioner ha HA!
The thing that comes with meeting new people is how to approach the subject of you. Whenever you get a bunch of mommies together, of course the obvious questions are going to be "How many children do you have, and what are their ages?" I still haven't quite figured out how to answer this question without making the other person uncomfortable, but I don't feel comfortable excluding you. Over the last couple of days alone I have answered this question, and of course had to tell your story immediately following when the eyebrows get raised. At the moment that I'm talking about you, I can keep it together. I even got asked today if I felt comfortable talking about you, and my reply is always "Of course! I am SO incredibly proud to be your mommy!" I don't want it to be about me...I don't want the pity stares. I just want people to know about you!
I'd be lying if I said that the emotions of missing you, and even having to talk about you like you aren't here, get to me later in the day. As hard as it is, I look at this as a good thing because telling your story keeps you living in a way...telling your story refreshes my emotions and feelings for you when sometimes I tend to become numb to it all....telling your story is letting somebody else know that you were here and that you made a difference.
I love you so much baby boy, and as long as people keep on asking, I will continue to share your story....
I will tell them all about you!