February 27, 2012

The Third Little Thing......That Leaves Me With A Broken Heart

Dear Carter,

Today has been one of those days when your big sister just will.not.quit.pestering.me.  It is a constant whine-fest, and I have to admit that I have been at my wits end for most of the afternoon about it.

This girl is just bored and really REALLY needs to start the first grade.
As she sits here asking me questions every twenty seconds while I am trying to write this blog post, I am reminded that I really do love it....ok, so maybe I would prefer it if she would just pester me with snuggles and kisses, but honestly I do love it because SHE IS HERE WITH ME.

I found out this afternoon that an old co-worker and friend of mine is now a part of my club. 

He lost his sixteen year old son yesterday.

I am heartbroken that somebody who I care about is now on this path with me.....I feel heartbroken that anybody has to walk this path, but this just hits very close to home.  I keep on replaying conversations that we had long ago and think about how much simpler things were then...how we had no idea that we would end up here.

Maybe that's part of the beauty of life.  Good or bad, you never know what's right around the corner....although it's a very tough challenge seeing the beauty in losing a child.

And so today I will be thankful that at this very moment I can see the beauty in losing you.  I can see that it was the ultimate healing for you.  I can see that these years without you are just a very small chapter in the whole book.  I can see that we will be together again. I can see that all of these small things that are annoying me (like your sister's pestering) are really blessings because I get to spend more time with her, and I will work hard to appreciate them.

But I must pray that my friend and his family will find these same comforts.

Our prayers are with them.


The Wife!! said...

Isnt it Funny how something as frustrating as a child whineing can remind us just how precious life really is. Its so amazing to me to read your posts.. It reminded me that when Chanler Whines and cry's ALL day that I need to be grateful that he is here on earth with me. That 9 years ago when his kidneys started to fail, I could have lost him...
:( That I could have been here today hurting soo bad for his little Whines and crys.. Love you Heather!!! Thanks for the reminder!

Laurel said...

Heather....I love you AND all your words of wisdom! I think we all have days like this with our kids, and it is good to remember that we need to even cherish those moments. I've thought of "our" co-worker these last two days, and how sad I am for his family. I've been sick to my stomach. Prayers for his family and yours....Love you Heather!